Hey guys, I have decided to start a new blog rather than continue with this one.

Here's the URL:

http://buttercup-lifewithapinchofsalt.blogspot.com

And this is a whole new me...starting afresh and being brilliant at it :) Welcome :)

Come home,or not...It's really your choice...!!!

For all the wishes we made
For all the moments past,
For all the memories here,
For all these things that were you and me...
Come home,or not,
Its really your choice!

For all the days we had,
For all the joy we shared,
For all the love we held
For all that which made us you and me...
Come home,or not
Really,its your choice!

For all those sunny mornings,
For all those rainy nights,
For all those misty sunsets,
For all those wintry daybreaks.....
Come back home...
Or not...Its your choice really...!!!

Up and about in Holmestown

I am feeling very writerish. I am sitting at the Costa in Baker Street, enjoying a solitary hot chocolate and looking out of the window,with my notebook and a book. My mobile browser seems to be working fine finally. Thank God for the little blessings in life.


I am waiting for the friend who I mentioned in the previous post. He has gone to rub noses with all the celebrity statues down the road at Madame Tussauds. My work this morning was just a bit from here,at Marble Arch. Then I went for a long walk down Park Lane by Hyde park and then,came here.


I come here sometimes. After train stations, I think coffee shops are the best to observe people. Partly because of the overflowing variety of people at all times and partly because of their long windows. I like this one especially because of its location. Baker street is always bustling with people. Also there are many eateries in its vicinity and am particularly partial to their hot chocolate with marshmallows.


This is more like an oldies' hangout. I was introduced to this one by my very feisty and very old boss. At the table right next to mine are a couple of them discussing quite dotingly about their dogs.


Here's the end of solitary time. My friend is here. Adios!

Putting Randomness into words...

(1) Closure is a weird thing. It is hard. Yet sometimes it is the greatest gift you can give someone,because that means you truly can let go,move on and be happy. You can be at peace with yourself.

(2)I am happy now,happier than I have been in months. Somewhere I understand that I have figured out something that I'd been cracking my head over. Figuring things out make me happy. I have to know stuff to be happy,whether it be studies or work or relationships. As far as I am concerned,not knowing is the worst feeling in the world.

(3) I had an almost Carrie Bradshawesque epiphany while talking to one of my closest friends yesterday.  I didn't used to  believe in having sex without love or commitment,the way most men do it. I mean,I have come across it in movies or books or serials or hearsay,but didn't really believe that was possible. A very recent experience,revelation, whatever, from a highly trustworthy source changed my perspective and opened my eyes to such a possibility. This was how the above mentioned conversation went.

Me: If men can do that,then why can't women?

He: You really think so?

Me: Well,yes I think.

He: I see...you have never been in love.

Me:No I have,I have just been desensitized and disillusioned too many times for comfort.

He said again: You have never been in love.

Me: Have you?

 He just smiled. At this point,I almost expected him to say "Abso-fucking-lutely". But still,that smile was enough. 

My take on Men and Love-in two words,Both Suck!!!

I read Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice when I was 12 or 13,while I was still in the "boys are scum" phase (which I still am to an extent and which belief gets stronger and stronger everyday). Lizzy Bennett was my heroine,feminist to the core,independent,strong...but then she went ,and got married to the insufferable Mr. Darcy. At that time I felt like I had been wronged,like a dear sister betrayed me..because men were the enemy and she vowed to live forever with one of them..Oh the Shame!!! lol ...

Lizzy was perfect in my eyes. Barring the constraints of those times (that Austen lived in and therefore Lizzy too), she was "the woman". She was smart,literary,intelligent,pretty,fearless... She is said to be portrayed by the author on herself. I recently saw the movie "Becoming Jane" based on Austen's early life and her alleged romance with Thomas Lefroy (politician and Judge who was the stereotype for the character of Mr. Darcy). Then I decided that more than Lizzy,it was probably Austen herself who is my heroine...

While I agree that I am not so much of a feminist all the time (I am,though in small doses),I loved Austen's feminist heroines. I wish I could say the same for her heroes. All her heroes are such arrogant toerags,Edmund (Mansfield Park) probably being the only sweet one (a little spineless though). This probably holds true for all the great love stories of the world. From Will Darcy to Rhett Butler to Mr Big,all the heroes are arrogant,self-centred and brutally sarcastic. And women do swoon over such men to an extent that makes me wonder... Do women  actually 'dig' these abominable "qualities"? And why is it that the smart,beautiful,intelligent and independent women of today (including myself...lol) feel that life is worthless without these absolute jerks??? Complete and total mystery...sigh :-s

In movies we  see that the sweet, thoughtful guy always triumphs over the jerks...or the jerks change colour to form sweet little lambs... How many such  men do we find in real life? And the ones that we think to be lambs turn out to be wolves in disguise. Are there no nice,kind guys in the real world...in which case,what exactly is it that all the women in the world are looking for? We may as well turn all gay...lol ;)

Note:-Kabhi kabhi poori duniya ka pyaar kum pad jaata hai...pyaar to bus ek hi se miljaaye na...kaafi hai.......

Me about Myself...

I have been in the process of learning new things about myself,re-evaluating myself,trying to find the person whom I had lost somewhere,the person who I really am.

I learnt that I don't hold grudges. No matter how beastly you have been to me now,I will not hold it against you when you have a bad time,or about 5 years down the lane,whichever is relevant. So if you caused me some great mental trauma some years before,feel free to ask for a favour now(lol). 

I have learnt that insecurity and inferiority complex are like my second skins. No matter how much ever I try to shed them,they just grow back over time. I have always been 'that' girl,the girl who takes time to make friends,the girl who find it difficult to trust people,the girl who is conscious of a million things all the time...It was so mentally exhausting,worrying about stuff all the time...I tried to get over it my concentrating my energy elsewhere...as I still do...but at night,when I lie in bed,all those feelings,fears come storming back to me...in multitude...I am still learning how to deal with them...(An example for my insecurity: My boyfriend once told me that I am not the top priority for him any more. I came after studies,work,family(which I totally understand) and friends(which I don't). He has been true to his word ever since. Blowing me off to hang out with  friends is something he does very frequently. He probably doesn't even realise it now or even remember saying this to me. It all happened a million years ago...But I remember it every day...not voluntarily,it just comes to me,out of the blue...).

I have learnt that I worry incessantly about the people I care,about their health,work,habits,thoughts...everything...I don't feel comfortable telling them that (obviously) but that is something I can't consciously stop. What I do is just push it back further into mind and tell myself that I will worry about it later,when I have time (very Scarlett O'Hara'ish,I know,that's why she is my evergreen heroine)...I know how stupid it is...but it just keeps cropping its head up now and then,and I push it back down again.

In Gone With the Wind,Old Mama Fontaine says that the worst thing that can ever happen to a woman is the feeling that she has seen the worst. I try to keep that in mind,always. Whenever anything bad happens,I tell myself that it is not the worst thing in the world. I try to believe that from somewhere or the other,I will gain the strength to go on...that I would never be put in a situation which I can't handle. I have learnt that even in the most utterly hopeless situations,I always search for a ray of hope,inevitably...that I never give up trying,no matter what...that work isn't what actually scares me,it is that feeling of hopelessness,of defeat and I channel all my strength into making something work,whether or not it is worth trying.

Most of all,I have learnt that,despite all the misgivings and weirdness and obsessions,I am really not a bad person. That I love people and care about them and am fiercely loyal and protective of them(despite my anti-social qualities). I am really not a bad person.....

Camden Outing!!!

I had an amazing day today. This was the birthday shopping that Cuttu has been promising me. There are these quaint rows of shops in Camden town,the street market and the Horse Tunnel Market.

I never thought I would find Lord Ganesh sitting around in a Chaadar so far away from India. But I turned around and Voila...there he is...

My high point of the day was my purchase of three very promising books. Can't wait to get started :D

I have wanted to buy a trapper hat for a long time. I got a doggy one !!! 

I know it looks weird...but I look cute in it :)

This is a Black Onyx set in Sterling Silver. I know,I know...no one wears black stones...But then,I am not like anyone else...lol ;)

Love comes in the lock form these days,with key et al...wish I'd known that before...and by the way,it is a watch too... Cool right!!!

So that was my day today,with two of my dear friends, frolicking around Camden..Most fun I have had in a long time !!!